


Do You Need a Dialing Wand?

by SarahOl1



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: F/M, I Blame Tumblr, Originally Posted on Tumblr
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-21
Updated: 2014-05-21
Packaged: 2018-01-26 01:32:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 652
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1669772
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SarahOl1/pseuds/SarahOl1
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Prompted on Tumblr by becisvolatile.  Darcy fat fingers the send-to on a racy text.  The recipient is more intrigued than appalled.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Do You Need a Dialing Wand?

**Author's Note:**

  * For [becisvolatile](https://archiveofourown.org/users/becisvolatile/gifts).



_It has been a long day_ , Darcy thinks as she pulls her phone from a slouchy, over-the-shoulder bag. She is glad everyone came back from the mission relatively unscathed, and she can tell by the excitement Thor showed in returning to Jane that they have been missing the comforts of home. She knows James joined in this time around, and she decides that instead of stopping by tomorrow to ask him to join her for some “welcome home, let’s decompress” coffee, she’ll send the sometimes flirty, but consistently damaged soldier a little text as an invitation instead. She plans and costumes accordingly, pulling a Wonder Woman costume out of her closet that she kept after Halloween a few years ago. She makes up a sign saying, “AMERICA THANKS YOU FOR YOUR SERVICE, WOULD YOU LIKE HER TO SERVE YOU (SOME COFFEE)?” and takes a few photographs of herself from the appropriate angles before picking her favorite. She realizes that she might be stepping just beyond the lines of their new-ish friendship, but she can’t resist the pun, especially since she has been consistently teasing him about his freshly redesigned America-friendly arm decal. She scrolls through her phone going through her contacts from “America, FUCK YEAH!” to “Barnes, James” and startles quickly when she hears Jane closing the door to the apartment they shared when Thor was away. She hits send and scrambles to change and find out why Jane is back.

_____________________________

Steve returns from his mission debrief to relax in his pre-war Brooklyn home. He pulls his phone from his pocket and sees that he had received a picture message from Dr. Foster’s assistant on his way back. Steve had gone into their lab at Tower with Bucky one day after a mission while they planned to get some coffee and had somehow left with a lesson on emoticons and texting. Curious to see what new thing she might have to teach about the relative value of photo-related brevity in modern communication, his jaw drops as he opens the message. 

Rather unexpectedly, (but not at all unpleasantly) he sees a scantily clad Darcy dressed in some kind of comic-book costume mockup of his colors. It’s the message on the sign that really gets his mind going—was she serious? Because yes, he would like America to service him, after seventy-odd years of service some reciprocation would be nice! He had never really thought to look beyond Darcy’s smirk and modernity to see her as something other than a relatively nice, attractive girl that liked to socialize with Bucky. This somewhat surprising little twist caused a tightening in him that felt right. Just about as right as the gorgeous breasts spilling out of that costume and the saucy little wink she was giving the camera. Without taking much time to compose his thoughts, Steve quickly types back to her.

_____________________________

Darcy returns to her room after finding Jane some condoms shouting “Next time buy some yourself—I’m only your keeper at the lab!” as her friend runs out the door. She looks at her phone on the bed and sees a new text waiting for her. From Steve. She swipes to view the message and sees, “ **How about tonight?** " right under a miniaturized picture of the photo she sent to Ja—

_Oh. Fuck. Fuck me. Fuckity fuck fuck. Wait? How about tonight?!_

The roller coaster ride her stomach just went on calms as a very pleasant scene plays out in her mind. The thought of a super nice, apparently unashamed, sexy blond (non-Thor) hunk getting handsy with her seems like it might be just what she needs tonight. She quickly responds to him.

____________________________

“ **Sounds like a plan, meet me at 8 at the Nexus of the Universe.** ”

Steve feels confused for a second, googles “Nexus of the Universe”, laughs quietly at his phone, and goes to get ready for his date.

**Author's Note:**

> So... this is my first piece of writing ever to be published that doesn't have a technical bent. It's not great, it's short, and I'm a little rough on making things sound colloquial and comfortable, but I'm posting it! Here's to no longer being *just* someone else's beta. Ironically, this is unbetaed.
> 
> Oh, and for all you kiddos out there, the dialing wand comes from an amazing episode of the Simpsons called "King-Size Homer". It is an absolute classic.


End file.
